Tuesday, March 14, 2006

The Mentally Ill Find Me Appealing (Pt. 2)


Things started out alright. Heck, I was happy just to have someone over 6' leaning over me. My parents were relatively happy with my choice; after all, he did attend our church. That alone was a marathon run in the opposite direction of my past little boyfriends. But as time progressed, I began wondering what in the world I had gotten myself into and a little upset that I'd provided such an easy-out for the girl before me. (I stopped saying "You're welcome" every time I saw her due to the awkward silence that would usually follow and because of the lack of conversation that follows a statement like that.) Never before have I begun to so deeply regret my meeting someone, and yet, I would do it twice more after this particular relationship.
He got so mad so quickly, it became comical. Though, the joke was only funny between the rest of the world and I. When I was in his presence, my mouth was literally left hanging open in a most unnattractive way, like I had pushed the "pause" button in the life of a big-mouthed bass. Not because of my awe and wonder for him, but because I didn't think anyone who wasn't on medication could comfortably lay claim to the outrageous things coming out of his mouth. There isn't enough web-space for me to try to describe all the ridiculous, insane things he tried to demand of me and even littler space for me to describe how incredulous and dumbfounded and furious I felt day after day. He would call me to argue. I'm not kidding. Some people use that lightly, as a way of saying that a lot of their conversations would evolve into arguments, but I'm not using that phrase to expedite any process--he literally called me to argue. Why would I answer the phone? Good question. Well, being that age and thinking I was in "love", I felt I had a certain obligation to. But more heavily, I would be in enormous trouble the next time I actually did answer, had I neglected to the time before.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

OK, so you realize fairly early on that the guy was nuts. But you stay with him? A little unsolicited advice for next time. When you meet someone, it takes time to discover who they are. If, during this time of discovery, you see (or suspect) something that isn't right to you, take a step back, turn, and run. A relationship should be GOOD for you. It should make you a BETTER person - not a more miserable one.